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Why is Self-Love So Hard for Women? Interview with Andrea Ellsworth

Why is Self-Love So HardI’ve been a practitioner of self-love for several years now.?It’s a concept that came to me intuitively, on a day where I felt I looked and felt my worst with a face full of acne and a post-baby body. It was one of those moments where you know the Universe has thrown down the gauntlet–that it was time for a big attitude adjustment. Prior to that, I had tried just everything outside of myself to have the skin and body I wanted. And when it didn’t work, I blamed myself and thought the worst of thoughts every time I passed my reflection in the mirror.
This intuitive moment led me to understand that I didn’t want to live the rest of my life hating myself every day.?Plus,?I sure didn’t want to be an example of a mother who hates herself to my daughters (who were just toddlers at the time). If I wanted to truly be happy and live my life with confidence–and raise happy, confident daughters–then I needed to learn to love myself as I was right then and there–at what I thought was my “worst.” So I did. And I lost the weight and cleared my skin. But it was one of the hardest things I ever did.

Why is self-love so hard?

Why is it easier to compliment and say kind things to a stranger, but not to ourselves? Why is it hard to take a compliment from a stranger without downgrading ourselves in some way in the process? Is this familiar to you?
“You have really beautiful skin.”
“Thanks! It’s this new makeup I just bought.”
“That’s a stunning picture of you.”?
“Oh I can’t take credit–the photographer did a beautiful job.”
Self-love is hard. It’s a concept nearly as hard to grasp as alternate universes or a female god. But if you’re trying to heal your skin–or your physical body in some way–it’s where you have to start. It wasn’t until I was able to love and accept myself for who I was, no matter what I looked like, that I was guided?to make?right decisions for my skin and health that ultimately gave me the physical and emotional results I craved.

My guest today is Andrea Ellsworth, of Andrea Ashley Co.?

AA3This is part 1 of our interview. Andrea is a lot like me in many ways. She’s an aesthetician who was perplexed by the fact that though aestheticians are trusted to help women achieve the skin they want so they can feel how they want, they receive very little brand-neutral training on how to do that. Andrea shares my frustration with the skincare industry, that its main approach is so “either or.” Meaning you either have acne OR sensitive skin. Dry skin OR mature skin. So your skin gets treated one way, even if you have other issues present, and without questioning what the potential source of those issues are.
Andrea and I also share the same philosophy that skincare should be customized to each individual person’s needs, and that ultimately, using skincare products isn’t about clearing up acne or getting some other desired result. It’s about helping women feel the way they want (and deserve!) to feel about themselves. Andrea is also an aromatherapist, and Part 2 will focus more on essential oils and aromatherapy as a holistic skincare philosophy.?Part 1 focuses on custom skincare, but also the bigger issues of women’s empowerment and self-love–and how we can make these things?easier and more accessible for women.

Watch Part 1:?


My biggest takeaway was when Andrea made the point about how we can’t buy all these external things like skincare products and clothes to make ourselves feel better, and then call ourselves words like “fat cow” or “ugly” when we put them on. Until we can change the negative self-talk and stop looking outside of ourselves to fix what we feel–or don’t feel–on the inside, we’ll never feel–or look–the way we want to.
What was your biggest takeaway from Part 1 of my interview with Andrea? Be sure to tell me in the comments below.
Click?HERE?to subscribe to my podcast and download the audio of this interview,?FREE on iTunes.

About Andrea Ellsworth:

Andrea Ellsworth has an?educational background in advanced skincare, organic skincare science, clinical aromatherapy, and has over 10 years experience in the holistic health and spa industry. ?Andrea has brought together her many passions to create Andrea Ashley Co, a holistic aromatherapy and custom skincare company.
Andrea Ashley MagazineAndrea prides herself on providing pure, quality essential oils and creating truly custom, one-of-a-kind products based specifically on each of her clients’ individual needs. A big part of her focus is curating an online shop where consumers can rely on safe, honest information,?better understand what is going on their skin, and how to properly use essential oils for overall well-being.
Andrea Ashley Co?offers custom made skincare, and aromatherapy supplies, as well as raw ingredients for the D.I.Y’ers that?are not only kind to the environment, kind to animals, and kind to our skin and bodies; but that also inspire?women to be kind to themselves and to each other.
Check out all of Andrea’s?resources, online shop, and inspirational online magazine, Andrea Ashley, which focuses on holistic skincare, self-care and self-love at www.andreaashley.ca. You can also connect with Andrea on Facebook and Instagram.

Don’t miss Part 2! Subscribe for free email updates so it arrives in your inbox as soon as it’s published.

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