“That product was supposed to be for my skin type–yet it still made me break out. There must be something wrong with my skin.”
“I don’t understand why no matter how hard I try, I can’t stick to the X diet, even though all my friends are doing it just fine and are seeing great results.?There must be something wrong with me.”
“I really want to join my neighborhood’s jogging club, because all the moms in the neighborhood look like they have such a great time together chatting while getting more fit. And their workout clothes are so cute too. But everytime I try to jog, my body hurts for the next several days. What’s wrong with me that such a simple exercise is so hard on my body, but no one else even seems sore?”
We always seem to default to wrongness.
Why is it that when something doesn’t go our way, most women (heck, probably a good amount of men too) automatically default to the conclusion that it didn’t work because there’s something wrong with?us. Whether it’s something simple like a skincare product that doesn’t produce the desired results, or deeper feelings of inadequacy or guilt surrounding falling off the wagon or not being able to participate with a group because for whatever reason, it’s not the best fit; telling ourselves it’s because there’s an inherent wrongness with something about us is a tactic that only pushes us deeper into negative thought patterns.
If someone believes there’s something inherently wrong with them–be it a physical feature, a personality quirk, or something even their very existence–that’s the ultimate brick wall. You could?say anything to try to encourage a person that there’s nothing wrong with them, but until they let go of any deep seated beliefs of wrongness, nothing will change.
We can blame society, art, pop culture, the media, Barbie, Disney princesses, you name it for planting the seeds of wrongness in a young girl’s or grown woman’s self image–but ultimately, it’s up to that individual to tell herself “No. I’m perfect the way I am.”?That might seem like an oversimplification of a deeply complex issue–but I believe that the first step to busting through the brick wall of wrongness–no matter how tall or thick we’ve built it–is to reframe our feelings of wrongness into realizations of perfection.
We are all One with the same energy–and the same stuff–that created everything.
We?have within us the same perfection as the most perfect red rose. We have the same level of perfection as the majestic lion, and the fuzziest little golden retriever puppy. Our existence, and every part of us is the result of the same miracle that created everything in the Universe (including the Universe itself) that you’d consider perfect.
The?jump between wrongness and perfection might seem too vast to leap.
Sometimes we take that leap as a leap of faith, and decide we’re tired of feeling wrong all the time, so why not try feeling perfect and see what happens? Other times, we need a bit of a bridge. And that bridge is made of one positive reframe at a time.
So let’s reframe the sentences above to start.
“That product was supposed to be for my skin type–yet it still made me break out. Well clearly that product was made for someone else’s skin, because mine is perfect as it is–it just needs nourishment that this product didn’t provide.”
“I don’t understand why no matter how hard I try, I can’t stick to the X diet, even though all my friends are doing it just fine and are seeing great results. I’m OK with that though because I know that I’m intuitively guided to eat the perfect?foods at the perfect times for my perfect body.” (That last sentence is great to use as a daily affirmation, by the way!)
“I really want to join my neighborhood’s jogging club, because all the moms in the neighborhood look like they have such a great time together chatting while getting more fit. And their workout clothes are so cute too. But everytime I try to jog, my body hurts for the next several days. I understand that everyone’s bodies benefit from different types of exercise–and because my body is perfect the way it is, then clearly jogging isn’t the type of exercise it needs. I think I’ll try yoga instead.”
People don’t like the word “perfect,” because honestly, I think it puts a lot of pressure on them. ?We have these preconceived notions that we are only perfect if we have this, this, and this–and not this, this, or this. That’s not how I define perfect.
I don’t believe the Universe makes mistakes. And because we all come from the Universe, there are no mistakes in us–therefore there’s NOTHING wrong with us. If nothing’s wrong with us, then we are therefore perfect. Training yourself to have default reactions of perfection, rather than wrongness, can take time–so start with awareness, and everytime you catch yourself having feelings of wrongness about anything about yourself, reframe them immediately.
I’m sure you have your own thoughts and feelings about the words “wrong” and “perfect,” and I’d love to know what you think.
Either comment below, or come over to the Spiritual Skincare Sundays private discussion group on Facebook and share with us there.
Sending you blessings of love and perfection!
